The Mysterious Case* Of The Bag On The Bike

The white plastic bag hanging off my bike's right handlebar was new. I was pretty sure of that. I hadn't pedalled to work with a plastic bag on my bike. Had I? No, no, I hadn't. It was a long day at work, and I was pretty tired, and now here was a mysterious bag on my bike in the bike cage at the end of day.
For some reason, my first thought was maybe not what everyone would have first thought: here, I deduced, is a bag with a corn cob in it.
But it was heavier. Different shape. No, not a cob of corn. Why was I being tested like this? (Actually, my first thought was it was bag of dog poo, but there's no use even mentioning that as part of the official story.)
I untied the loose knot and opened the bag and saw that whatever it was was wrapped again in paper towelling. Poking out was a red and white top with printing that said: New Belgium Brewing. This was a beer bottle, I concluded.
And there was beer in it. It was bottled beer. There was a bottle of beer on my bike. …
For some reason, my first thought was maybe not what everyone would have first thought: here, I deduced, is a bag with a corn cob in it.
But it was heavier. Different shape. No, not a cob of corn. Why was I being tested like this? (Actually, my first thought was it was bag of dog poo, but there's no use even mentioning that as part of the official story.)
I untied the loose knot and opened the bag and saw that whatever it was was wrapped again in paper towelling. Poking out was a red and white top with printing that said: New Belgium Brewing. This was a beer bottle, I concluded.
And there was beer in it. It was bottled beer. There was a bottle of beer on my bike. …